Eating Crow....er...boogers

Many of you will remember this post. It's still one of my favorites.

Well. *sigh* I have to eat some crow.

When you have a child you dream that she will be the perfect little lady. That she will always be clean, have a bow in her hair and will never, ever be one of those snot nosed kids that you see running around Walmart pulling pickle jars off shelves and screaming "MOM! I POOPED!!!".

Those dreams are quickly shattered when your child comes.

Today I stopped and got at Sonic before coming to work and when the carhop came to deliver my order she sort of just stared blankly at me for a few seconds. Ok, well, I THOUGH she was staring at me. It was then I realized I had been hearing subliminally little smacking noises of goodness coming from Zoe's mouth and little satisfied "mmmm Mmmmss".

I turned in my seat to see a ginormous booger on her finger. My heart started pounding and I felt very much like those those characters in Hitchcock movies look when the camera zooms in on them at a weird angle. I could hear myself internally screaming "NooooooOOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo" as she began licking the booger. I'll spare you the details of what transpired next. Suffice it to say that A good time was had by all and Zoe was greatly disappointed when her little treat was gone.

Although it seemed like ages, this all occurred within a few mortifying seconds and I again became aware of the carhop, who was uncomfortably waiting for me to pay her. I shoved a $20 in her hand and got my change, then tipped her a dollar for her trouble and thanked her for always being "so nice" to us. I hope she keeps her mouth shut.

I was mortified. Wracked with hilarity as well, but utterly mortified.

Hi, I'm Kris, and I'm the mother of a booger eater. No judgment here. Just peace and understanding.